Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am