Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
