so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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