You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
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