I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize