The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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