Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
