is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
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She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
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Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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