too bad you live with your parents still
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize
