Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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