I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
