if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
