Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I smell like Dick and happiness
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
