I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize