There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
