I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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