he wants to bone in the snuggie
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
