just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
