i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
