dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
