But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
