But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
A+ Viking dick
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