I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Randomize
