All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize