I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
