If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Send help, water and tortillas.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize