Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
He has the fingertips of a God
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
