im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
