Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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