IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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