just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
