Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
