everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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