Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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