How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Sex with a fat chick.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore