Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Randomize
