Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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