Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
