if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
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