AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
