I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
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I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
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I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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