they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
