I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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