just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
