Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
