Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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