My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
