I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Randomize
