I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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