butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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